(   ) Excellent, ( x ) Good, (   )Average, (   ) Needs Improvement

 

So that is it. At the end of my first six months of work in Pakistan, I get a "Good", which makes it my worst performance evaluation to date. My prior three (in the US) have been the highest possible attainable. So who do I get to blame? Myself? The country? The job? or Orkut?

 

My first thought was that I have been wasting too much time (on activities like writing this) while at work! But I never did that at any of my previous jobs. I would hardly ever check personal email at work at my last job. I haven't changed too much since then... so what has?

 

And the answer is... the corporate culture. I belive the assessment to be fair for the most part. I do not deserve to be among the top performers at this place. And the worst part about it is, that I am fine with it! I am enjoying not working as hard as I used to; or not performing up to my own standards. I have, in effect, lowered my standards. It was not a concious decision to do so, at least not entirely. Looking back, the reasons for that decision that come to my mind are:

 

1. Contract: I have a two year contract right now that pays me a fixed amount for that entire period, no matter what miracles I perform. Even if I don't do anything, I have a guaranteed annuity set up for two years! The HR department might think it is a great thing as it keeps their costs low and steady, but it has taken away my motivation to work. I see this as a major problem in Pakistan. Employers want work done, but are unwilling to compensate employees adequately for the work, especially if the employee is unmarried. In Pakistan, people tend to stay with parents, in family homes, and employers know this. So they pay for the 'pocket money' and not according to the worth of the person.

 

    Personally, my boss is a great guy, and has sent me on two foreign trips during my short stay here. I belive this has been done as incentive to keep me motivated; and it has worked to an extent. But for some reason, it has not been enough. And you will see the reasons if you read more.

 

2. Work environment: Nobody here works late. When I first joined, coming from a financial consulting background, the statement nine to five meant nothing to me. You come as early or late as work requires you to come, and leave as early or late at your work requires you to leave. For about one month, I would very often be the last person to leave the entire 12 story building. But quickly, I learned that it was not really appreciated.

 

   I am not saying that everyone should stay late every night. Staying late is a very bad thing if any one of two factors are present: a) It is done on a regular basis, and/or b) It is done becuase of poor time management. But here, even if there is work to be done, people leave. There seems to be no sense of urgency and a great lack of initiative present here.

 

3. Work: My specialty is insurance, and within that, non-life insurance. That is what I have studied, and that is where my work experience lies. Now even though I joined this place in their insurance department, I was quickly transferred to another, non-related one. The dillemma was: I prefer the work of the old department, but prefer to work with the people in the new department. So I did both! Stuck between the two, I managed time and work as best I could without letting either department down too much. But even though I didn't let anyone down, I didn't make them too happy either.

 

    This is, actually, another problem we face today in Pakistan. We have no space for specialists. We prefer generalists. I remember going to an orthopaedic surgery center in the US and there were about 10 different doctors there, all orthopaedic surgeons, but specializing in different body parts. There was only one qualified to operate on my knee! Such is not the case in Pakistan, medical profession or otherwise.

 

    When I was interviewing for jobs here, I was proudly told by a senior officer at a very large company that they only have Chartered Accountants in their Finance Department (in case you don't see the point, CA's are accountants... not experts in finance. But since we don't have many MS Finance people roaming the streets, while having accountants by the bucket-loads, accountants are sitting in the finance department, and the senior management is proud of it!). Similar thing has happenned to me. I am an expert (of sorts) in insurance, but since they needed people in a newly created department, I was transferred there. Probably a good thing for the new department because I fit in well with the team there, but not necessarily the best thing for me. So some loss of willingness to work was experienced there as well.

 

And lastly:

 

4. Politics: Although I have been at this place for a little over 6 moths, I have seen some very hard-working and knowledgeable officers come under the knife for political reasons. I work for an organization that has a lot of dealing with the government and politics comes in at all levels. I know officers who should be earning a lot more than they are; and I know officers who should not have ever been hired, but are now at high posts. I know people whose sole purpose in life seems to be to plague the workplace and too see what it takes for the other person to lose their temper; and these people are flourishing. I see changes that we should make in the laws, but are not made because of vested interests.

 

Despite all this, I know that a lot of blame should come on me. Despite all that is happening around me, I should be acccountable to myself; I should not let a few people get on my nerves; I should try and learn the new field that I am working with... who knows if I'll ever get another opportunity like this.

 

Unfortunately, i fail to see it that way. If I see it, I fail to realize it. If I realize it, I fail to adapt to it and implement it. And you know what? I do not feel an ounce of remorse ro regret over what I am doing. Anyone know what's wrong with me?